The "Main" Feature
Yep. Apparently Ms. Tiffany Fallon was the Playboy Playmate of the Year for 2005. I can only assume that the other 11 contestants were as lovely as they were naked, so what was it that made Tiffany a little extra special?
Could be those big blue eyes or the wonderfully curvaceous figure that Tiffany's got workin', but I've no idea how these gals get voted in as the year's best Playmate. Is it a call-in vote? Can I cast a ballot online? Because if all I have to do is look at 12 naked women to become a part of the voting process, please feel free to send me a membership card.
Clearly, Tiffany's a doll. And a sincere bit of thanks to whomever chose to celebrate a gal with an actual female figure -- and not just some blond stick with a pretty face. Only thing holding Tiffany back from pure perfection, in fact, are the very things she installed to earn the extra attention: namely, the boob implants. They're not huge or overstuffed or anything too noticeable - but we experts can spot the fakies a mile away ... especially if the gal's butt nekkid on TV with the freeze-frame on. (Ack, did I really just type that out loud?)
Yup, so here's Tiffany's very own DVD release. The main feature runs only 30 minutes, during which we get several interview segments with the blue-eyed beauty -- and in between all the mindless chit-chat ... nudity! From Tiffany, of course; not from me. We get peeks at Tiff as she frolics in a fountain, strips for a horny admirer, disrobes in a mansion, and undresses for the Playboy folks. It really is just like a Playboy pictorial brought to life, for better or for worse.
If you're the sort who likes to collect the whole line of Playboy DVDs, well then this one's ... another one to buy. It's got a very pretty lady who takes off her clothes more than once. Often to music and somewhere near a couch. I'm at a loss here, fellas. This stuff is tougher to review than The Weather Channel.
I can say that the highlight of the feature is the footage from Ms. Fallon's celebratory pictorial. Those clever camera-folks at Playboy chose to pose their model in a variety of snapshots based on the classic pin-ups of yesteryear. Hey, I never said it was Hamlet, but it's still a slick & sexy little concept.
Video: Fullframe and full-frontal, fellas. Video quality is just fine.
Audio: Dolby Digital 2.0; between the mood music and the "I'm just a normal gal!" chit-chat, you won't notice the sound quality one way or another.
Nothing screams for a few extra features like a main course only 31 minutes in length.
Tiffany's Playboy Magazine Shoot runs just over 4 minutes and gives us a few more prime peeks at Tiffany's talents.
Playmate of the Year DVD shoot is a 3-minute sorta-behind-the-scenes look at the making of the video. And yes, there's more nakedness afoot, so don't miss it.
You'll also get a trio of Playmate Video Profiles for the omnipresent Tiffany Fallon and a few of her pals: the perky Cara Zavaleta (Miss November 2004) and the top-heavy Stephanie Glasson (Miss July 2004).
Keep on clicking around to find Tiffany's photo gallery, some of those rather hilarious Playmate Data Sheets, an extensive catalog of all the Playmate Videographies, and a bunch of trailers for Sexiest Amateur Home Videos, Women of Fear Factor, America's Sexiest Bartenders, 2005 Video Playmate Calendar, 50 Years of Playmates, and America's Sexiest Lumberjack Barber Lesbians*.
OK, this just in: Men like to look at naked women. And as far as naked women go, Tiffany Fallon is currently among the world's most popular. But while I can certainly see the appeal of Ms. Fallon's many assets, these Playboy videos are entirely airy and more than a little silly. Once the novelty of the nakedness wears off, you're left with a DVD that doesn't exactly fit into your collection next to Stripes, Scarface, and Jaws.
Rent It if Playboy's your thing, but be prepared to get some angry looks from your girlfriend.
* Just kidding on the last one.