The World According to Miley Cyrus: An Unauthorized Story:
OK, so I'm not the target demo for this DVD, but the way it has been assembled indicates the real target demo is probably a paper towel left on the top of someone's refrigerator. With any luck, I'll at least get some angry emails from Mylie fans, after I rip into this lame DVD. Then again, even Mylie's audience of ten-year-old girls is savvy enough to be disappointed in and enraged by this overlong puff-piece of a cash-in.
By accounts from this paint-by-numbers effort, the young Cyrus took to acting of her own accord, and not to somehow salvage the achey-breaky family name. Her turn on the Hannah Montana show for Disney is now legendary, and Cyrus is using that fame to launch her own music career. Like other Disney starlets, (Lindsey Lohan, Hillary Duff, etc.) Mylie hopes to reap the rewards of stardom, while avoiding the pitfalls - something she appears poised to do, thanks to her family's centered, conservative values - yet apparently she has to stop taking racy photos for magazines, and starting silly feuds with Selena Gomez.
Does any of this sound remotely interesting or in depth? I didn't think so, since this tedious, unbearable 43-minute documentary is nothing more than a rote, poorly assembled group of previous Cyrus sound bites from lame television interviews, mixed with liberally reused and recycled red-carpet footage and interviews with little girl fans. A British woman narrates the whole tepid, tame affair emotionlessly. We're thankful for the decent audio from said narration, as every other bit of audio - and there's plenty to suffer through - sounds as if it were recorded in a cheap beer vat using someone's cell phone.
Our narrator gently leads us through the high points, and a few low ones, (both mentioned above) as we listen to Cyrus blather prepared statements while doing promotional interviews. I mean, if The World According to Miley Cyrus includes Cyrus noting that her new record is a "breakout record for a [particular] demographic," then I might just have to choke myself to death with a spreadsheet. I doubt any 'unauthorized story' would tout a star's concern for her demographic as being a particularly juicy tid-bit, and there's no information here that wouldn't be better presented in a 35-page 'learn-to-read' volume sold to elementary schools from the bookmobile.
OK, kids, to sum up: The World According to Miley Cyrus is nothing more than a bunch of previously seen interview clips, brief kids' sound bites, lame narration and video padding. At less than 45 minutes, it's too long, bad audio marks it as an amateur effort, and it tells you nothing you couldn't get from a Parade Magazine interview. Infinity Entertainment wants to steal your money, girls. Don't let them.
This fullscreen 1.33:1 ratio television-quality presentation consists of a bunch of barely-acceptable-quality video clips culled from random sources. It's not really worthy of being on a DVD.
Solid Dolby Digital Stereo audio is only acceptable during narration. Every other single audio clip is tinny, full of echoes, and completely not OK. I don't recall hearing any of Cyrus's music, either, but what do I know?
Four additional Profiles of about 5-minutes each are included. Subjects are the now-disgraced Chris Brown, Dakota Fanning, Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron. All profiles are of the same lame quality and content as the feature.
This unauthorized story should be unreleased as well, as it consists of nothing but fluffy, shallow old interview clips with Miley, other Disney starlets, and little girl fans. Sound quality is horrible, the picture is fairly lame, and the whole thing reads like a 60-second 'entertainment' news piece stretched out to unacceptable lengths of boring lameness. Cyrus fans should Skip It.
- Kurt Dahlke
~ More of Dahlke's DVD Talk reviews here at DVD Talk I'm not just a writer, I paint colorful, modern abstracts, too! Check them out here KurtDahlke.com