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House on Sorority Row, The

Elite // R // November 14, 2000
List Price: $24.95 [Buy now and save at Amazon]

Review by G. Noel Gross | posted January 13, 2003 | E-mail the Author
CineSchlock-O-Rama
Short Takes

School's out and the house mother says it's time to vamoose, but seven luscious babes of greekdom hang around for one last killer bash. Mrs. Slater (Lois Kelso Hunt) is the old bat who rattles around the house with her walking cane, sneering at the girls and ruining all their nocturnal encounters with boys. She finally twists the panties of the wrong gal, Vicki (Eileen Davidson), who talks her sisters into playing one doozy of a prank on the doddering crank. Only the gag works TOO well and they give the old broad a coronary. Naturally, they weigh down and sink her body in their green, slimy swimming pool just as party guests begin to arrive. The girls all swear secrecy, but our heroine Katherine (Kate McNeil) lets her do-gooder conscience get the better of her, especially when coeds start dropping dead. Overall, it's sorta lean on giggle and jiggle for a proper sorority girl flick, but despite that, a fairly horrific revenge tale emerges. Three breasts. Eight corpses. Cork popping. Gratuitous disco ball with strobe. Bitch slapping. Throat slashing. Multiple puking. Head tumbles. Sorority chick engages in coke humor, "To my mother, who never let me forget I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. Momma, you were wrong! It's up my NOSE!" (1983, 92 mins, 1.85:1 anam, DD mono, Trailer, No insert.)

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G. Noel Gross is a Dallas graphic designer and avowed Drive-In Mutant who specializes in scribbling B-movie reviews. Noel is inspired by Joe Bob Briggs and his gospel of blood, breasts and beasts.
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