Sylvester Stallone is here to obliterate the Burmese Army in Rambo, the brutal return of an 80's action icon. Bring an umbrella for all the bloodshed. Even more horrifying, the creators of Epic Movie and Date Movie have been financed again, back with the loathsome Meet the Spartans. Brendan Fraser and Sarah Michelle Gellar battle the mighty forces of fate in The Air I Breathe, a picture critic Jamie S. Rich calls, "yet another hearts-and-flowers affirmation of how the good will out." Also in theaters this week: a frequently soaked Diane Lane battles the internet in Untraceable, step-dancing boogies out again in the jovial How She Move, and Bono and the boys slip right into your arms in the glorious concert experience, U2 3D. Be sure to catch reviews of other recent Theatrical Films!