"Evil Never Tasted So Good! Gary Busey is The Gingerdead Man!"

That's what you'll see if, for some ungodly reason, you happen to be holding the latest Charles Band DVD. If so, put it down. Immediately.

After spending much of the past two decades churning out colorful schlock like Dollman Meets the Demonic Toys' Puppet Master Robot Attack, Mr. Band has settled down with a new outfit called "Wizard Entertainment," and if you happened to read my reviews for the first two Wizard flicks (Decadent Evil & Doll Graveyard), then you already know two things:

1. As an old fan of Band's early work, I'm actively trying to like his new stuff. Honest.

-and-

2. These movies are just all sorts of terrible. Seriously.

I was half-expecting to have a royal hoot with The Gingerdead Man, but the thing never comes close to being colorful crap or affable camp. It's just ... dingy and tiresome and painfully plagiarized from Child's Play. Only this time instead of a doll we have a cookie, instead of Brad Dourif we got Gary Busey, and instead of actors, a screenplay, and an actual three-act story structure ... we have inept amateurs, a lot of aimless blather, and a formless movie that clocks in at about 55 minutes, not including the opening and closing credits. Put together one DVD, the triple feature of Decadent Evil, Doll Graveyard, and The Gingerdead Man might be worth maybe 9 American dollars.

Frankly I'm amazed that something this low-rent and borderline-unwatchable could come from a guy who has directed over 100 movies. True, they were always low-budget and cheesy, but at least they felt like real movies! The Gingerdead Man is a few limp kill scenes, a truly moronic concept, and a whole lotta brain-damaging "cookie" puns. Not even the gimmick casting of Gary Busey can bring any color to this crummy affair.

The DVD

Video: It's a grungy, fuzzy, mucky widescreen transfer. As tacky as the movie itself.

Audio: Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo. Crank it up loud if you want to get the full effect of Gary Busey's mumbly mini-cookie monster.

Extras: There's an 18-minute behind-the-scenes featurette which is (far and away) more entertaining than the movie itself. Cast & crew members visit from the Gingerdead set, and we get some a peek at some of the FX work. Also included is a 5-minute blooper reel, a friendly promotional announcement from Charles Band, and the trailers for Doll Graveyard, The Gingerdead Man, Cinemaker.net, Monsters Gone Wild!, When Puppets & Dolls Attack!, Decadent Evil, and Petrified.

Final Thoughts

I wish I could offer the opinion that Charles Band is back and slingin' his trademark cheeseball goodness, but the guy's 0-for-3 with his new production company, and after watching all three flicks in order ... things don't seem to be improving.