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I Drink Your Blood
"Satan was an acid-head!" screams the butt-naked hippie psychopath we meet in the opening frames of 1970's I Drink Your Blood -- and this sequence does a fine job of foreshadowing the rest of the flick: weird, silly, ugly, and so damn loopy that you can't take your eyes off the thing.
Here's the plot. You'll love it.
A group of Satan-worshipping (and apparently shower-hating) hippies wander into a small town that's on the verge of extinction, harass, rape and torture a few folks, and then hole up in an abandoned house. So one small boy decides it's his job to save the day, so he serves all of Hell's Hippies a bunch of meat pies that have been laced with rabid dog meat. Needless to say, things don't end well.
The hippies are a colorful lot indeed, and that's kind of like me saying that fire is mildly warm or I Drink Your Blood is somewhat bizarre. The leader is a bare-chested Native American lunatic, and he's flanked by some sort of Asian fortune-teller drug addict, a pregnant moll with a nasty disposition, the slutty blonde who serves it up to all interested parties, a straightlaced backpacker dude, and a bunch of random cacklers. And not one of 'em doesn't L-O-V-E Satan.
Energetic, sloppy and entirely watchable (especially if you're sitting down with bong and/or beer), David Durston's I Drink Your Blood is true-blue camp all the way. Plus it's vicious, violent, and frequently fall-down funny. Clearly created with a grindhouse-style audience in mind, IDYB doesn't worry too much about the quality of what's onscreen, but the quantity of outrageous shit it can pull off before the end credits hit the scene. Frankly you haven't lived until you've seen a gang of Satanist hippies massacre a house full of rats before chowing down on rabid dogmeat and flying into a mega-murderous rage.
Before it's all over, I Drink Your Blood has turned into a decidedly stupider version of Romero's original Night of the Living Dead, but the thing whizzes along like a really bad hit of acid. And while it's highly unlikely to ever be considered a "good film" (by any definition of the phrase), there's little denying that I Drink Your Blood delivers on its promise of wild, weird and frequently wacky material. Plus it's got a freak-out finalé that simply defies description.
Video: It's a fullscreen transfer, and I'm happily surprised to note how, well, clean the movie looks! It's still get the grain of the era and some old-school artifacts in the print, but the colors and strong and the carnage is more than appreciably visual. Pretty impressive, really.
The flick is available in one of two ways: either the Uncensored X-Rated Theatrical Cut or the Original Director's Cut. I know; I'm also confused. Also worthy of note is the audio commentary between writer/director David Durston and leading man Bhaskar. The duo seem to take their movie just a little bit more seriously than is necessary (or, let's face it, realistic), but if you just got done cackling your way through the main feature, you might find some of the chat-track insights worthy of merit. Hell, I'm impressed the DVD producers even knew how to track these guys down in the first place.
Four deleted scenes are included, all of which are fairly amusing, provided you dug the flick. There's also a 3-minute blooper reel, a stills gallery, the original theatrical trailer, one radio spot, some filmographies, and some coming attractions clips for a whole bunch of Grindhouse Releasing titles.
Bad movie, but a good time -- provided you're even half as twisted as I am.