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Bianca Beauchamp: All Access

Halo Eight // NC-17 // January 29, 2008
List Price: $24.95 [Buy now and save at Amazon]

Review by Daniel Siwek | posted December 12, 2007 | E-mail the Author
The Movie
With an almost Tootsie-like news-clip build-up, we're ready to embrace Bianca Beauchamp (model for Maxim, Bizarre, Playboy, Marquis, Skin Two) as the loveable fetish-personality and protagonist of this little video diary at Montréal's, Fetish Weekend. With a "Car Wash" rip-off for a theme song, the odyssey begins on an up-beat, if not passé note, but we're quickly thrust into Beauchamp's world of drinking, putting on make-up, drinking, getting her hair done, drinking, fitting in a skin-tight latex outfit, drinking, going to a fetish event, drinking, eating, drinking, etc. We're not saying that this girl is a drunk, but it seems this adventure has just as much to do with her quest for booze, as it is her desire to make an impact on the scene. Directed and edited by Martin Perrealult (who also appears on camera), the template should promote the model of mention while having her host an "all access," video-magazine centering on the Montreal's fetish scene. In other words, Bianca Beauchamp: All Access is little more than a glorified, albeit more artistic and explicit, edition of E's Wild On series.

Bianca is feeling self conscious about the speech she has to make this evening. She's kicking off the Fetish Ball that's being thrown by ClubSin at the Cleopatra Club. Her nervousness makes her more endearing, and she's really something to look a - as she explores her make-up options the camera is explores her cleavage. After a few drinks, she's bubbly and not afraid to let her titties pop out. Wait. Are we reviewing a porno here? Well if it's not the actual porno, than the film also resembles the behind the scenes footage you would get with a porno. We get to meet her hair stylist "The Richard," an expectedly over-the-top headache of a character; model, Susan Wayland; and the wonderful Jean Bardot, who was visiting. Oh, and she's got a ferret that's got free reign on anything in the house, and is sometimes accused of stealing stuff.

Moving from the apartment to the fetish ball, the graphics of a "pass" appear whenever we meet someone of significance - like Johnny, the owner of the Cleopatra club, a guy who's seen the scene's come and go and still shows enthusiasm for it all. There's a real-time feel to this feel to this fetish show, and while she's changing backstage, there's a boy/girl act doing their thing to The Doors' "The Spy." The intercutting between the main performance and the backstage hysteria lends a definite feeling that we're in the mix. Bianca ends up doing great as master of ceremonies, and to top off the evening they drink and go out for local fast food delicacy called, Poutine - a concoction of fries, cheese, and gravy. The contrast of their outfits in the yellow and red striped restaurant makes for an interesting photograph. Jean Bardot threatens to steal the show at a few points within Bianca's movie, but it's in a natural way. As comfortable as Bianca is with the camera, she never seems to forget its there, and sometimes its to the project's detriment. Instead of going with her frustration or cracking the surface to see how deeply she really feels about something, she too-often turns to the camera in game-show host mode that seems ingenious. We know there is so much more to her, but the filmmakers rarely try to get underneath that latex skin she's always wearing.

The DVD
Video: Shot in HD, Bianca Beauchamp: All Access is presented in a very cinematic Anamorphic Widescreen. And even if the inherent drama doesn't quite live up to the potential of the medium, the colors on these costumes makes for dazzling eye-candy.

Sound: The audio is professional enough; from the dialogue to the peripheral chaos going on in the club, the filmmakers do a good job bringing us on location without giving us a headache. On the other hand, aside from a handful of electronic cuts, they give us lousy remakes of ""For The Love of Money," makes me think I'm watching The Apprentice and believe me, the Donald is the last person I want to think of when Bianca's in a rubber schoolgirl dress.

Extras:
Fantasia Premiere Featurette: This featurette was shot on July 21st 2007 at the Fantasia Film Festival for the world premiere of this DVD. Martin Perreault plays host for this section.
Extended and Deleted Scenes:The extra scenes include Bianca at the book signing, in the car, cutting intros, etc. It also features Tiger, Jean Bardot, and Tim.
TV Interviews: These interviews from Canadian television, it basically collects the on location reports from the fetish balls and the signing.
Trailer:
A trailer about the DVD is pretty true to the packaging
Short Films: Embryo and OSMOZE are two films that were featured at the Fantasia Film Festival, where Bianca Beauchamp also premiered. Both of these films were created by the Vincent Brothers (Dominic directs and Francis creates the music.) Both films feature fetish-set-ups and are presented in music video form. Bianca is transcendent as the fetishists muse.

Final Thoughts:
Bianca is simultaneously over and underexploited in a DVD that bares her name on it. The filmmakers are perfectly fine with setting Bianca up to be our drunken host, while showcasing Montreal's Fetish clubs, but they fail to make us understand who she is, and why she's into the scene in the first place. Yes, they're some impressive outfits to be seen, and we definitely get a flavor for the city's nightlife, but if I have to hang out with "The Richard" (with his fingerless gloves, ala Vince Neil on-Too Fast For Love, and lines like; "was up," "it's hot," and "fuck yeah." Makes you long for Paris Hilton - at least she's not a poseur and is really American) for one more second, I'd rather go back to the States and enlist for Iraq right away. Martin Perrealult provides us with a vintage interlude of two pencils getting it on. Cute, but it distracts us from the real goal of making the fetish out of the fetish model herself. She's the star, after all. And even if she was just to be our Vanna White, so to speak, the girl that guides us through the Montreal's fetish game, then Webdreams did a much better job at making us believe in the city's currency.


Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered? Woody Allen
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