Octopus
Trimark // PG-13 // $14.99 // October 9, 2001
Review by G. Noel Gross | posted December 18, 2001
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They sure did go to an awful lot of trouble to make this eight-tentacled stinker that ineptly attempts to mix generic political thriller elements and a big, scary octopus. The cause of it all? ANTHRAX! Yes, it's everywhere, even at the bottom of the ocean and it's mutated several generations of peaceful sea critters to spawn a value-sized monster that lays the smack down on a U.S. nuclear submarine. Before all of that, though, there's 30 minutes of Tom Clancy hoo-ha with an Eastern European terrorist named CASPER (Ravil Issyanov) who bombs the American embassy in Bulgaria and is accidentally captured by a junior CIA spook (Jay Harrington). They're to be secreted back to the U.S. aboard the sub when nature conspires against them. CineSchlockers will be seduced by sassy Carolyn Lowery as the free-love scientist who just happens to be aboard to advance the plot and hike up her skirt. No breasts. More than 30 corpses. Strip poker. Shakespeare-spouting terrorist. Gratuitous ticking time bomb. Octovision. Doc Fincher isn't afraid to speak in laygal's terms, "Considering its size, this thing has a craving for meat that would scare a cow out of its skin!" Rent It.

2000, 100 minutes, Widescreen (1.85:1), Featurette, Trailers.

Also available in the Creature Features boxed set with Crocodile, King Cobra and Spiders.

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G. Noel Gross is a Dallas graphic designer and avowed Drive-In Mutant who specializes in scribbling B-movie reviews. Noel is inspired by Joe Bob Briggs and his gospel of blood, breasts and beasts.


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