Our story concerns the quaint little town of Maryville, Texas which on the eve of its annual flower parade finds itself ground zero for the invasion of deadly African killer bees. These aren't just any old bees, potent with unknown strain of poison in their stings, angry, and (giggle) smart. The invasion gets its start when the bees nearly wipe out an entire military base. Luckily one of the survivors is entomologist Brad Crane (Michael Caine), who quickly takes control of the situation from thick headed, gruff General Slater (Richard Widmark) and calls on fellow scientists (Richard Chamberlain, Henry Fonda, and Katherine Ross) to aide him in averting the invasion. While the scientists try to come up with a humane way to dispose of the bees without hurting the environment, the townspeople (including Ben Johnson, Olivia de Havilland, and Fred McMurray) prepare themselves for a potential invasion, one that comes when a local kid tries to firebomb the bees. So, soon all of Texas is in danger of being overrun by killer bees and the town must evacuate. Throw in a nuclear power plant that refuses to shut down and the bullish army ready to bomb the heck out of the countryside, and the scientists are in a race against time to stop the bee migration.

Lets see, who else shows up to whore themselves out and collect a paycheck in a secondary role or a glorified cameo? The rest of the cast includes such old school stars as Slim Pickens, Cameron Mitchell, Patty Duke, Lee Grant, Jose Ferrer, and Bradford Dillman. And, of course its Pickens who is the standout in his one scene where he, to use Pickens speak, gets to see his Gosh dern soldier sons body no matter them there military fat cats say.

And now, an imagined conversation at Irwin Allen's production offices, circa 1976/77.

"Mr. Allen, Slim Pickens and Ben Johnson will be unavailable for The Swarm."

"Thats too bad. Oh well... Quick, get me Rory Calhoun and Buddy Ebsen on the phone."

It actually combines two disaster genres that were big in the 70's. The Swarm is 'large spectacle disaster' meets 'nature-gone-amok.' In other words, its one part Meteor and one part Day of the Animals. Although it was one of those big 70's overhyped scares, killer bees don't exactly present a very formidable celluloid animal adversary like say, a pack of roving dogs in The Pack. I mean, the first problem is they are tiny, and in lieu of some Bert I Gordon giant bugs, Allen had to come up with some way of making them scarier. One of his solutions was having big bee hallucinations when someone gets poisoned. This plot device actually amounts to some of the films more humorous moments, like Michael Caine tells a hallucinating boy to just touch the giant bee he sees and it will disappear (yeah, that happens with all hallucinations) and it completely ruins perhaps the films one good moment when Henry Fonda tests his bee venom antidote. Allen is just a bad director, plain and simple. Aside from accepting the film, he allows some horrible acting and even shoots scenes with severe continuity errors, like an ambulance crash that goes from day to night, to day to night between shots... Camera closes in on a fallen child outside a schoolhouse, the camera tightens on a close up of the kids hand clutching an all day sucker- Allen, no doubt, thought this was brilliant... But, Allen was also much like the cinematic equivalent of P.T. Barnum, always assuming his audience was pretty stupid. Just deliver the surface goods of stars and some action, and the moviegoers will flock to the cinema, regardless of the plot holes or other silliness.

Silly is the key word here. It is clear there a was some intent, at least on the surface, to make a rip roaring entertainment piece, but it is all phoned in and very hackneyed, lacking the grandiose frame in its action and charisma from its stars. Most of the dialogue is cliched exposition, relying on conveniences ("Yes, I've read your reports about killer bees"). The film is so underdeveloped and formulaic, like somehow we are supposed to believe Caine and Ross fall in love, when all they really do is drive back and forth between the town and the army base either delivering dry diatribes about the bees or their paper thin characters details. Likewise, a love triangle side plot between Ben Johnson, Olivia De Havilland and Fred McMurray is unconvincing, and 20+ years ago when the film was made, only my grandmother would have even the slightest interest in these dusty stars; today shes dead, so I have my doubts that there are many people left on the planet that would look very fondly on their dull part of the movie. Sorry to say, there is no Steve McQueen, Paul Newman, or Gene Hackman caliber of credible performance in this one. Hell, theres not even a Shelly Winters or Ernest Borgnine. At 156 minutes, it really wears out its welcome, since the tale minus the retarded exposition and over-extended, uneccesry to the plot cameos, its a story that could be told in about 30 minutes.

Truthfully though, as lame as The Swarm is, it does deliver unintentional laughs a-plenty. I'd never been able to watch the film all the way through. Last time I saw it was as a kid on tv in the early-mid 80's and it was not able to fully grab my attention like other "animals gone crazy" films of the era. But, while watching the DVD I found myself rolling with laughter at every disingenuous yelling session between Widmark's blustery general and Caine's corduroy entomologist. And, you know, I doubt there is a creature on the planet that wouldn't chuckle at Michael Caine woodenly yelling, "Look out the killer bees are coming!", or Widmark un-PC referring to the bees as "Africans" during the final third, as well as spitting such lines as, "Why worry about shaving when someones gonna' cut your head off?"

The DVD: Warner Bros. Originally announced with a bevy of extras (like commentary and notes on giant bug movies), Warner apparently decided to scrap that idea and release a more scaled down version.

Picture: Letterboxed. Anamorphic. The film does show some age, a little worn and grainy, muted colors, but it wasn't the slickest spectacle film ever made so at times it comes off like a tv movie. The print they chose to use is pretty fair, with some details people probably didn't notice on older prints, like the spots of pheromones they put on actors clothing to attract the bees that can now be seen. Edge enhancement is present on some of the background details, like computer key boards and air vents, but it doesn't prove too distracting.

Sound: English Dolby Digital 2.0 with optional English, Spanish, French, Portuguese subtitles. Hey, its fine. Obviously sound wasn't as slick back then, and the rudimentary audio presentation here is fine with no huge flaws other than fully capturing Olivia De Havilland's sappy line delivery.

Extras: 45 Chapters--- Cast and Crew Info--- Theatrical Trailer (2:16)--- "Inside the Swarm" (22:11) behind the scenes tv doc/special. Features clips of all of the actors snippets in which they state "facts" (their film dialogue, actually) about the impending bee attack and working on the film. Lots of behind the scenes stuff showing Allen and his signature multiple camera set ups. A basic studio promo, drumming up the killer bee fear by the narrator saying the film "...is in fact, a precidtion." Probably the best part was Ben Johnson's on set soundbite. While all the other actors do the same old selling of the movie, feeding the fear of killer bee attacks and how truthful the film is, Johnson just nonchalantly says with his cowboy swagger, "I guess it could happen. Bees is bees."

Conclusion: Well, I guess if you are a fan, pick it up. The transfer doesn't really have any gaping flaws to speak of, other than the fact that it was originally announced with far more extras. I think there are some films that deserve extras and some that don't. Lets just say, personally, it isn't killing me that Swarm didn't get a jam packed special edition. But, I can understand how a fan may be upset that WB didn't deliver what they originally planned.