Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I keep voluntarily reviewing these unauthorized music biographies? Could it be because I don't get VH-1 and I'm jonesing Behind the Music? After the debacle that was Eminem: Hitz and Disses comes Korn: R U Ready?, a collection of interviews with wannabes, hanger-ons, and former friends of the band Korn, whose fortunes have dipped recently in light of the rise of Limp Bizkit and Kid Rock.

Like Eminem (although maybe a little less so) Korn can be set apart from their peers by the dark, complex emotions that their lyrics uncork. Jonathan Davis, Korn's frontman, is known to be an intelligent, articulate guy with a loner past and some deep issues, but you would never know that from this shoddy documentary which contains no Korn music whatsoever. In fact, it barely has anything to do with Korn, but rather functions as an opportunity for their fans to show off their ignorance and racism (one girl in line for a Korn show at the Apollo theater refers to Harlem as the worst place in New York and another fan states "If you can have your Million Man March then we can have Korn at the Apollo.") and for Korn's outer circle of buds to plug their own bands.

The host, a guy named Pancho, is extremely annoying and often makes very un-documentary like statements like "Maybe that's why they kick so much ass!!!" Pathetic.

VIDEO:
The video basically looks like home footage. Nothing worth mentioning.

AUDIO:
The Dolby Digital audio is nothing special. Plus, lacking any real Korn songs the music is unimaginative rock noise.

EXTRAS:
Only a lame trivia quiz.

FINAL THOUGHTS:
Even die-hard fans of the band would have a hard time finding anything worthwhile in this piece.