THE FILM

Before I go into just how predictably atrocious "Bachelor Party 2" is, I'll state right off the bat that the first "Party" from 1984 was no seminal moment of American comedy filmmaking. However, it was an uproarious, good-natured romp that reveled in bawdy behavior effortlessly, while also solidifying Tom Hanks as a leading man of atypical grace. "Party" was imaginatively silly. "Party 2" is a dreadful encore.

To celebrate his upcoming marriage, Ron (Josh Cooke) takes an offer from future relative Todd (Warren Christie) to fly him and his friends (Harland Williams, Greg Pitts, and Danny Jacobs) to Miami to have the weekend of their lives with women, sun-drenched debauchery, rivers of booze, and more women. Once arrived, the shenanigans start immediately, taking the boys through misadventures with sex addicts, stripper fights, and best body contests. However, Todd has a different goal for the weekend: to catch Ron in a compromising position with a stranger (Emmanuelle Vaugier plays one of the candidates) and break up the engagement, thus ruining his chances to join the lucrative family business.

Funny thing is, "Bachelor Party 2" isn't even a sequel. This infantile fiasco is actually a remake of the original film according to the writing credits, so those expecting even the slightest hint of connective tissue are going to be disappointed. No Tawny Kitaen or overdosing donkeys to be found here, folks. Not even a Nick the Dick cameo. Blasphemy!

"Party 2" is purely a low-budget, highly-inane retread of pranks, jokes, and performances better suited for one of those "American Pie" DTV stinkers. Certainly the film isn't a complete mess, but its comedic offerings are lethargic and unimaginative, demonstrating that time has not been kind to co-writers Pat Proft and Neal Israel, who fail to rekindle their old "Bachelor Party" magic by trying to pander to the younger, frat-house demographic.

Maybe it's me, but the parade of slapstick Viagra gags (ingested "accidentally" for maximum eye-rolling effect), poopy diaper visual punchlines, and an extended joke where one of Ron's Jewish friends thinks a gorgeous German masseuse is a close relative of Adolf Hitler (the boys dub her a "Hotzi") just didn't tickle me. Again, the first "Party" is no statement of profound cinema, but it kept swell comedic time, and the more extreme sequences were pulled off by Israel with a generous spirit. All director James Ryan can manage to do is stage endless gross-out and gay panic sequences, while ladling in copious amounts of nudity to help offset the strange absence of glee the picture can't seem to shake.

Ryan is even worse with the ensemble, pitching the performances to vaudeville-like decibel levels. It's obnoxious, especially when everyone tries much too hard to sell such wretched writing. Actors such as Williams land a few of what laughs are available here, but he's quickly equalized by the likes of Pitts and Jacobs, who should do the industry a favor and stop acting all together. Jason Biggs lookalike Cooke also pushes too abrasively to be charming, anxious to find the goofball Hanksian melody of the original film, but ends up resembling one of those charmless actors who was miscast and knows it. It's a miserable performance of passive marital questioning and one-liner bungling.

THE DVD

Visual:

Presented in anamorphic widescreen (1.78:1 aspect ratio), image quality on the "Bachelor Party 2" DVD is expectedly lowball. This was a film scrapped together on the cheap, and it looks just like a grainy, 8mm student film, complete with questionable focus and poor framing. The transfer is soft, with minimal color warmth and murky black levels. However, detail is not a problem, since breast implant scars are visible throughout the film.

Audio:

The 5.1 Dolby Digital sound mix is a nice enough listen, with surround activity used for the 10-cent score and thumping beach party soundtrack selections. Dialogue and music are separated comfortably, though for some of these jokes, I wish the DVD's sound would've cut out completely.

Extras:

A feature-length audio commentary from director James Ryan and actors Greg Pitts, Warren Christie, Harland Williams, Danny Jacobs, and Josh Cooke is strictly for anyone who finds the movie even remotely entertaining. Basically one long drinking contest, the actors simply try to one-up each other in the joke department, forgoing a discussion of production history to ogle the actresses and make fart noises. If the film wasn't enough proof that these stooges should be sterilized and muzzled, this brutal, useless commentary seals the deal.

Deleted scenes (16 minutes) are simple scene extensions, obviously cut for time purposes. Most just embellish the hijinks presented and believe me this movie, at 100 minutes, could still use another 95 minutes of cutting.

"The Party Never Stops: Making 'Bachelor Party 2'" (10 minutes) is a flimsy featurette that starts off with original producer Ron Moler recalling the sequel pitches he's rejected over the years for being too "derivative." Way to stick to your guns, man. This fluff piece reveals a shocking pride in the final product from the cast and crew, who really think they've stumbled upon gold here. Ah, the humiliation of mandatory movie promotion.

"Analysis of a Stripper Fight" (7 minutes) covers a mid-movie brawl in a strip club, interviewing eager cast and crew, and showing BTS footage of the actual stunt work.

The goofily-titled "Gag Reel & Gags" (17 minutes) is about five minutes of bloopers, with the rest of the time allotted to "line-o-rama" ad-libbing. It feels endless.

Finally, a trailer is provided.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Anchored by a moldy plot spit out from the Screenwriter-O-Tron 3000 computer of atrocious watch-checking clichés, "Bachelor Party 2" is actually quite painful to sit through. What should've been a freewheeling display of skin, sun, and boozy good times is instead left to rot in this puzzlingly numbered debacle (about 23 years too late by my estimation); a film that mistakes bottom-feeding stupidity for vulgar entertainment value.