The Plot:
Offered in fully uncut and uncensored versions (meaning all the curse words are present and accounted for), here are the segments featured as part of the so-called Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy. Most are self-explanatory:

The Frog Prince
The Scotsman
Patient Zero
Cat Staff Meeting
Mountain Climber
The Bartender Says...
Name That Animal Penis
Die, Sweet Roadrunner, Die
Sex with...Part 1
A Fat Guy Working Out
The Gay Knight
A Douchebag Unicorn PSA
Fred Flintstone Takes a Shit
A Dog on the $25,000 Pyramid
Super Mario Rescues the Princess
Adopted
Stuck in a Life Raft with Matthew McConaughey
Two Persian Guys Try to Get Ladies Into Their Sports Car
He Who Lives in a Glass House...
Sex with...Part 2
Tarantino Performs a Circumcision
Fred and Barney Try to Get Into a Night Club
The Wizard of Oz, Adjusted for Reality
Monkeys Talk About Religion
Marital Troubles
Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road
Sex with...Part 3
Backstage with Bob Dylan
Barry Gibb Rides a Roller Coaster
Mad Cow Disease
The Scotsman Part 2
Dirty Vaudville
Beavers: Assholes of the Forest
A Trip to the Psychiatrist
Fat Jesus
Dracula Meets Magic Johnson
The Sneeze Throw-up
The Settlers' First Attempt to Buy Manhattan
Why Bob Marley Shouldn't Have Acted as His Own Attorney
Jesus and Vishnu on Christmas Eve
Ted Nugent is Visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past
Four Years of Entourage in 10 Seconds
Tara Reid is Not Looking So Good Lately
Things You Never Hear
Small Talk with Aunt Helen
Two Ducks Watch Meet the Parents
Jeff Goldblum Wafers
Marie Antoinette's Notepad
Sheep Shearing
What Happens if You Feed a Dog Chocolate While He Wears a Tin Foil Hat in the Microwave

The DVD:
Humor is personal. Just like taste in music or what frightens you. There is no such thing as universal wit. If there was, some joker would corner the market and make a small mint in the process. So before you start hurling hate mail in this critic's direction, remember - this dismissal of Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy is based on one middle aged man's individual perception. It is not meant as a judgment on everything Mr. McFarlane does, just the relative awfulness of this illustration of his professional prowess. About three decades ago, when he was sitting at boarding school sneaking joints after study hall, this omnibus of bodily functions would have sent him into altered consciousness fits of hysterics. Even today, he could see himself enjoying this compendium as part of a late night sleep aid induced delirium. But the critical portion of his personality also understands that this is nothing more than a collection of illustrated dirty jokes, the level of wit never extending beyond the basic scribbling along a middle school boy's bathroom stall. And when it comes to the scatological, he'll take South Park or Aqua Teen Hunger Force over this badly drawn burlesque any day.

What exactly is funny about a bride being crapped on? About an AIDS riddled man making love to a monkey? Do we really want to laugh at Fred Flintstone relieving himself in a one-note exercise of grunts and groans? If that was the case, your great uncle would be Carrottop. F-bombs can be funny, but not when they are the only source of satire present. Even worse, McFarlane always goes for the easiest of laughs. His ethnic humor is geared toward the patently obvious (a Scotsman who shouts loudly at the movies he's watching) and his sex gags are always about intercourse and its various supposedly hilarious parameters. To make matters worse, he misses the obvious elements within his various premises. Something like the "Cat Staff Meeting" makes no sense whatsoever, and the last sketch entitled "What Happens if You Feed a Dog Chocolate While He Wears a Tin Foil Hat in the Microwave" feels like a rip-off of something Adult Swim might do. There is nothing wrong with observable wit done well. We will giggle at almost anything just so long as it is done right. The Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy rarely achieves either, and when it does manage something silly, a few flops come along and undermine its effectiveness.

So is anything good here? Well, "Die, Roadrunner, Die" does a wonderful job of extrapolating on something we all thought about as kids, and "Fat Jesus" definitely has its moments (thought it does go on too long, which is saying a lot for a two minute bit). "Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road" delivers a potent punchline (though "to watch a man lay bricks" is still funnier) and "Super Mario Rescues the Princess" gives the Nintendo classic the tweaking it so richly deserves. Still, a half dozen out of several does not a success make. Even worse, many of the skits (like the "Sex with..." segments) are tedious in the obviousness and repetitiveness. Clearly, these were not made to watch in one big batch. Instead, as one time stingers, stumbled upon after a hard day at work or a tough day in class, the Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy serves its minor purpose. One day, MacFarlane may break out of his juvenile view of humor and deliver the legitimate laughfest he appears quite capable of helming. Until then, we will have to put up with his creative castoffs. Indeed, this is one compendium that feels like it was made up of leftovers, not prime comedy cuts.

The Video:
As per this critic's policy, Screener copies of DVDs are not awarded points for video or audio. If FOX does send a final product version of Seth MacFarlanes Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy to the site, this paragraph will be updated accordingly.

The Audio:
As per this critic's policy, Screener copies of DVDs are not awarded points for video or audio. If FOX does send a final product version of Seth MacFarlanes Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy to the site, this paragraph will be updated accordingly.

The Extras:
Nothing but nominal added content here. The four minute "Red Carpet" featurette is fawning and self-congratulation at its very worst. It's all "genius" and genuflections. The galleries offer the ability to see the various stages of the character design. If you're into that kind of thing, you might find it interesting. Otherwise, the bonus features are like the material itself - sketchy and superfluous.

Final Thoughts:
If you don't like punk rock, there is nothing this critic can say to convince you otherwise. If you love country and western music, there is no possibility that a review rallying against it can win your favor. So, in essence, coming up with a score for Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy is kind of pointless. If it's bad, the fans will foam at how unfair it is. If it's good, it flies in the face of the reviewers own laugh-free time with the title. In many ways, this is the kind of DVD that you have to try out first before making any kind of consumer commitment. As a result, a rating of Rent It will be offered. That way, you can judge with your funny bone before you evaluate with your wallet. If you love Family Guy, American Dad!, and anything remotely related to MacFarlane, you'll adore this collection of cheap shots. Otherwise, steer clear unless you want to be disappointed - over and over and over again.

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