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Naughty Stewardesses: SE, The
Nurses and cheerleaders were the first uniformed T&A starlets. Then cinematic exploiteers took notice as airlines began to sexualize their female flight staffs with daring outfits and suggestive advertising campaigns designed to lure horndog business travelers. Soon flicks like the Swinging Stewardesses soared at the box office encouraging drive-in king Al Adamson's coat-tailer The Naughty Stewardesses (1973, 104 minutes) and its wannabe-Western sequel The Blazing Stewardesses.
The movie: When Debbie (Connie Hoffman) arrives in free-lovin' California from Smallville, she's revolted by the brazen ways of her stewardess roomies. Like blue-eyed sexpot Margie (Donna Desmond) who is way ahead of her time with some progressive grooming habits. And the very first night the girls throw a hedonistic birthday bash complete with cold-cut sandwiches and a nekkid dude slathered in whipped cream in place of the traditional cake and candles routine. The birthday girl DOES blow something out, however. Nothing much happens, but sorta does, not unlike a fruitless foray into reality TV. Debbie gets herself mixed up with a photographer named Cal (Richard Smedley) who apparently moonlights as a creepazoid stalker. This drives our heroine into the arms of geezer playboy Ben Brewster (Robert Livingston) who pretends -- poorly -- he ain't angling toward getting into her drawers. By then, though, she's loosened up quite a bit anyway. After a foray into the burgeoning porn scene via the set of "Locked Loins," the picture jerks its wheel in an all-new, bizarro direction with an ill-conceived kidnapping, self-affirming rape sequence and other wackiness. CineSchlockers should stay tuned for Retro-Seduction Cinema's Blazing Stewardesses release. No word, though, on Stewardess School, the 1987 reemergence of the genre starring Ralph Malph of "Happy Days."
Notables: Eight breasts. Two corpses. Hitchhiking. Gratuitous shower scene. Knitting. Budding romance montage. Road rage. Gratuitous food fight. Nekkid photo session. Pool-side striptease. Hare Krishnas. One foot chase. Bimbo tossing.
Quotables: The sexual liberation of Debbie ... "How small town can I be? Imagine! I'm so provincial that the thought of making love to a naked man in front of strangers just makes me sick!" ... later ... "I feel so free. Perhaps by taking off my clothes I took my mask off too" ... and finally ... "Your hands are warm and I can feel what's on your mind. You've got wild ideas." In contrast, Maggie's always been at peace with her sexuality, "Life to me is one big orgasm. Getting stronger and stronger. I guess that's why I meet so many men."
Time codes: Crew member's kid gets an eyeful (6:55). Maggie has her nethers shaved by a gal pal before a night on the town (15:00). Originator of the Blue Man group (31:08). Shutterbugs get all the girls (46:30). Glimpse into the seedy world of underground porn (58:08).
Audio/Video: Fullframe transfer is surprisingly vibrant despite persistent dust and scratches consistent with its age and pedigree. Utilitarian mono track.
Extras: Writer/producer Sam Sherman takes viewers through a flick he really wasn't too enthused about making BEFORE convincing one of his Western heros to join the project. Bob Livingston had pretty much played all the greats from The Lone Ranger to Zorro before retiring to his favorite pastime -- the fillies. So, he lept at the opportunity to apply his craft AND cavort with beautiful babes as a the flick's "dirty old man." Sherman's commentaries overflow with the sort of detail and often amusing trivia that makes CineSchlockers salivate. His efforts to underscore Al Adamson's opinions and contributions are especially appreciated given the filmmaker's untimely passing. Trailer and TV spot. Two deleted scenes. First, a creepy coupling between Mr. Livingston and randy Mikel James (as Diane). Followed by some exposition about poor, troubled Cal. Static menus with groovy tunes by long-forgotten British popsters Sparrow. Reels on Blazing Stewardesses, Cinderella 2000 and Nurse Sherri.
Final thought: Who knew a stewardess picture could be dull!? A lovely cast, overall weirdness and Mr. Sherman's commentary earn this disc a higher rating. Recommended.
Secrets of B-Moviemaking!
G. Noel Gross is a Dallas graphic designer and avowed Drive-In Mutant who specializes in scribbling B-movie reviews. Noel is inspired by Joe Bob Briggs and his gospel of blood, breasts and beasts.