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Satan Was A Lady

Other // Unrated // August 13, 2002
List Price: $19.95 [Buy now and save at Satanwasalady]

Review by G. Noel Gross | posted September 28, 2002 | E-mail the Author
CineSchlock-O-Rama

Exploitation cinema lost its grandest lady when Doris Wishman passed away on August 10th. During her 40 years of prolific filmmaking, Doris was responsible for such sleaze classics as Nude on the Moon, Bad Girls Go to Hell and Deadly Weapons (featuring the 73-inch breasts of Chesty Morgan). And even in her 80s she defiantly proclaimed that "When I die, I'll still be making movies in hell." Well, it seems Doris wasn't kidding! Just three days after her death, Satan Was A Lady (2000, 83 minutes) debuted on DVD. It was her first feature in nearly 20 years and premiered to raves at the 2001 New York Underground Film Festival. But even more to her word, Each Time I Kill, the movie for which she'd just wrapped principal photography is being posthumously finished according to her request -- no doubt guided in spirit by this larger-than-life legend!

The movie: Sex. Blackmail. Betrayal. Murder. Go-go dancing. Yep, this is a Wishman flick alright. Red-headed Honey Lauren (as Cleo Irane) is a wannabe ballerina who, by night, eeks out a living peddling her bod and horsewhipping dirty old men. By day, she likes to drool outside a Miami department store window whilst longing for "that touch of mink" -- both literally and metaphorically. Cleo really, really wants this mangey fur coat, so being a woman of the Wishman universe, she goes about getting it in an excessively oddball way. Namely, by bursting into the office of well-to-do whipping boy John King (Edge) and demanding he cough up 25,000 smackers or she'll gab to his wife about how he spends their discretionary income. King pays, but Cleo's beatnik beau Eddie (Glyn Styler a.k.a. Brent Newman) steals and gambles the loot away before she can buy her goldang coat. That's when things get more complicated with Cleo seducing King's dim-bulb son Brett (wooden adult star Hans Lohl) who actually treats her like the princess she desperately wants to become. Except, of course, she's covertly trying to extort MORE cash from his pop and otherwise busying herself by slinking in and out of her clothes for no apparent reason. If only those were the extent of tawdry lil Cleo's vices. Not so!

Snarling, venom-spewing lounge singer Glyn Styler's deliriously smarmy portrayal of Eddie is an archetype straight from the grindhouse roughies of the '60s. Right down to his ill-fitting, woefully outdated wig and black shades. But none of those surly sleazeballs could SING like this guy!!! His performance is significant part of the bizarre time-traveling charm of this picture that's set very much in the present, but through Ms. Wishman, becomes a familiar echo of exploitation past. CineSchlockers will be amused to note that the film's title is actually recycled from her extremely brief directorial foray into '70s hardcore with Satan Was A Lady and Come With Me My Love (a.k.a. The Haunted P@#%$).

Notables: Six breasts. Four corpses. Boozing. Gratuitous lesbian barkeep. Wallet to the crotch. Pole dancing. Exceedingly slow elevator. One crippled cat. Bitch slapping. Comically inept lipsyncing. Coronary inducing phone call. Ashtray as a deadly weapon. Seductive thigh smacking.

Quotables: Cleo gazes out an office window and coos, "Heights make me feel SO sexy!" Later, while standing over the bloodied corpse of a once gorgeous rival, "You're not so PRETTY anymore!" Eddie waxes philosophic, "We all gotta go sometime, babe." But he's got his eyes open, "I wonder what that BITCH is up to!?" Mr. Roboto whimpers, "Cleo, I think about you morning, noon and night. I just can't get you off my mind" and "Cleo, I think I'm falling in love with you."

Time codes: Stunning whips 'n' flames opening sequence (:00). Perhaps the world's first REVERSE striptease -- as performed by tattoo'd hiney covergirl Lindsey Amodeo (8:38). Another undulating display of the erotic arts (33:35). Doris makes her Hitchcock-like appearances (1:01:37) and (1:05:59). A hooker's dream come true (1:13:00).

Audio/Video: Presented in its original widescreen (1.85:1) format with a fine transfer that defies its low-budget pedigree. Presumably inspired by the Miami locale, there's a richness and vibrancy of color throughout. The Dolby Digital 2.0 track robustly showcases the score and dialogue equally well.

Extras: Now here's a rare treat! CineSchlockers can lurk around the set during production and behold Wishman at work via a fantastic behind-the scenes reel (20 mins). Now it's not the type of slick infomercial so familiar to us all. There's no interviews. No back patting. Just raw footage with a focus on the filmmaker's unusual style. Doris doesn't merely sit behind the camera and yelp "Action!" and "Cut!" No, she's right up with the actors on set. Pantomiming action. Mouthing dialogue. It's FASCINATING! Especially when intercut with the scenes as they appear in the film and one realizes how she's just BARELY hovering off camera. (Well, not always, as noted in the timecode above). Also, from the main menu, there's the ability to jump to Styler's scorching solos "You Killed My Love" and "Come Cry With Me." Motion video menus with audio. Particularly lurid sleave and disc artwork (but crudely printed).

Final thought: If bad girls really do go to hell, they've got one of fringe cinema's finest calling the shots. This neuvo classic is truly a must own. Highly Recommended.

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G. Noel Gross is a Dallas graphic designer and avowed Drive-In Mutant who specializes in scribbling B-movie reviews. Noel is inspired by Joe Bob Briggs and his gospel of blood, breasts and beasts.

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Highly Recommended

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