Disaster L.A. is , no matter how you slice it, just such a movie: a tepid, well-photographed action adventure full of performances that could use lots more massaging before being released upon the world. Though not a 'found footage' movie, Disaster LA most closely resembles Cloverfield with zombies. During an LA house party, we're introduced to brothers John and Turner (who look like brothers from another mother and father, if you know what I'm saying. By which I mean John resembles Adam Levine and Turner looks a bit like John C. Reilly - there's no way these two share a common parent, and it's the first sign of trouble with the movie. If you can't cast actors who look even remotely similar, you've destroyed suspension of disbelief before you've even got one minute of footage in the can.) But I'm trying to be empathetic, right? At this LA house party, our cast of characters does its best to not look like dumbasses, (it doesn't work) and to simply be young adults at a Solo Cup kind of shindig. Except that when John sees his ex-girlfriend (they broke up two weeks prior) with a new man, he does his best to make nice by going over to say 'hi'. He even offers to get a drink for the new guy, who asks for a Long Island Iced Tea. I can buy the premise that a swarm of meteors has destroyed LA and turned everyone into zombies, but I can't buy the idea of that Long Island Iced Tea exchange.

Pacing in Disaster L.A. is brisk, and it's a relatively fun thrill ride, with decent zombie makeup, mild gore, and effective if pedestrian action and directing. Unfortunately, the tenor of the whole affair is that of half-baked ideas rushed into production and shoved out the door without much thought. Dialog and plot devices are a problem, and performances of said dialog don't carry much weight. This combination leaves us with a cast of characters we don't really care about, rushing through scenes without much tension or verve, on the way to a nonsensical conclusion that stints on payoffs both emotional and visceral.

For instance, the party during the opening scene is interrupted when someone watching the news(?!) calls everyone into the living room to catch an innocuous (at least at first) story about a meteor shower! That's some party! Next day, after meteors the size of school buses have decimated downtown LA, one character halfheartedly moans, "I can't believe this is happening! Do you think anybody is dead?" Maybe that statement is meant to be a portent, but it makes little sense in context and is grammatically off. There is more not-quite-right dialog - delivered poorly - to come, but what follows is a collection of scenes of John running around his neighborhood in a tizzy, zombies standing stock still before jerking their heads our way in a stylishly evil manner, and the ever popular instance of someone shouting, "Go, go, go, go, go, go!"

So I apologize to writer/director Turner Clay and producer-brother John Clay, but Disaster L.A. looks to have needed a bunch more incubation before hatching. The movie looks pretty good, with nice CGI destruction and a brisk pace, but it's missing some elements: performances that feel real, dialog and plot-points that feel real, a real sense of menace and danger, and an outcome that feels important. [SPOILER ALERT] No, we don't care if John and his girlfriend get back together, because neither character feels real. Did they make it to safety? Who cares?

The DVD

Video:
The 2.35:1 ratio 1080p HD widescreen presentation of Disaster L.A. is no disaster, but it's not all that great either. The movie hardly seems meant to arrive on anything better than DVD. There is persistent digital grain that casts a pall over fine details and renders the greenish-sepia-toned color scheme even less appealing than it sounds. The transfer is otherwise fair, and doesn't appear to have any serious issues with fidelity, it simply seems that there isn't much detail to work with in the first place. Like the movie itself, the image is kind of 'blah' and seems to simply hang there on the screen in dull fashion.

Sound:
DTS HD 5.1 Master Audio utilizes the format to better effect, with a rollicking sound scheme that's pretty solid throughout the audio spectrum. Whiny dialog occupies the mid and upper ranges clearly, while explosions present a nice, deep bass response. The mix is very active as well, with dynamic placement of sound effects, and an overall appropriate blend of all elements - no aspects compete with each other, music is mixed nicely, and sound effects are either loud or subtle when they need to be.

Extras:
Extras are pretty much limited to English SDH Subtitles, and French and Spanish Subtitles.

Final Thoughts:
No, Disaster L.A. is not a serious disaster. Rather, it's a kind of bog standard zombie movie that feels as though it wants to be Cloverfield-dynamic while mostly failing. Characters are unreachable by way of clunky dialog delivered in a halfhearted way, while cliches pile up. It's fast-paced, but only mildly engaging, if at all, and not the least bit scary. Rent It if you're bored.

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