Catch The Heat (1987 AKA Feel The Heat) finds Kino Lorber hitting bedrock with their choices for Studio Classics. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, there are no more old movies to release on Blu-ray, if the quality and stature of this action-comedy is any indication. Featuring an entirely too easy-going Tiana Alexander as an undercover FBI agent, Catch The Heat succeeds mostly in killing 87 minutes. Viewers expecting to find a good time in this drug-smuggling programmer will need to mentally incapacitate themselves beforehand.

Alexander plays Checkers Goldberg, a fiesty, sexy, wise-cracking federal agent whom nobody in the underworld takes seriously. That's her secret, she lets tough guys think they can manipulate her, before she flies up in the air to wrap her shapely legs around their necks. Goldberg goes from the mean streets of San Francisco down to an undercover job in Buenos Aires, where she's supposed to track down and bring to bay notorious drug kingpin Jason Hannibal (Rod Steiger cashing a check). Goldberg chooses as her cover the role of an exotic dancer named Cinderella Pu. This movie was written by Stirling Silliphant, (high point, the Oscar-winning screenplay for In The Heat Of The Night - perhaps Siliphant thought putting the word 'heat' in the title would distract people from this, one of his check-cashing low points, for sure) with great dialog for Pu like "are they with us, or agin us?!"

At any rate, if the '80s hair metal menu screen doesn't scare you off, then you can probably take the rest of this mess, which reads like the pilot episode of a Fox network series that was rightfully left to die alone. Sure, they pack in gun-battles, car-chases, and Alexander's brand of martial arts mastery, but such things are weakened by their limp nature, semi-comedic-but-not-really staging, and lowly casiotone soundtrack elements.

From a purely critical standpoint, the movie feels cobbled together on every level, with action scenes edited into a pure collage of disconnected elements. It never feels like Alexander is the one actually landing any kicks, for instance. We're treated to a frontal shot of her raising her leg high, then a reaction shot of a stuntperson flying into a wall, which looks like it could have been shot a year later on another continent. (Spoiler alert: online production notes indicate that very well might have been the case.)

The patchwork quilt nature really fails regarding Steiger's scenes. Sporting a ten-dollar-toupee, Steiger seems to be doing a 50 cent Brando impression, as he rattles off his lines one after the other, straight into the camera, to be later edited together with scenes of whoever he's supposedly speaking to. That said, his mobster isn't that sharp of a tool anyway, as he's devised a way to surgically implant relatively small amounts of heroin inside his human drug mules as breast implants. Certainly a costly and inefficient way to get drugs across the border. On the other hand, I might have preferred Steiger's detached line readings over those of David Dukes, playing Waldo Tarr, the world's smarmiest secret agent, and nauseating love interest of Goldberg. The happiness of this couple was the last thing on my mind as I limped across this movie's finish line.

Catch The Heat finds Kino Lorber hitting bedrock in their search for movies to release on Blu-ray. With sun-setting efforts from screenwriter Stirling Silliphant and Rod Steiger, this ineffective blend of action and comedy is a little too light on the laughs, not-very-convincing in the action department, daft, dopey and dumb. If mildly exciting cheese with characters named Checkers Goldberg and Cinderella Pu is your cup of tea, give it a rent. But most movie fans should probably just Skip It.

The DVD

Video:
You can Catch The Heat in a 1.85:1 1080p transfer from Kino Lorber. This Blu-ray looks much better than a DVD, but is not reference standard by any means. Detail levels are about average, and compression troubles are kept pretty much on the down-low. Colors are pretty natural, though skin-tones vary. It's not a very dark movie, so black levels are low-key as well. A little bit of speckling peeks out every so often, but on the whole, this is just a slightly below-average (due to source materials and production history most likely) and just OK image.

Sound:
Dolby Digital DTS 2.0 sound does just fine, with dialog clear and distortion free. Dynamic range is underwhelming, but delivers the cheesy '80s metal and casiotone goods from the score.

Extras:
Extras are limited to English Subtitles and the Theatrical Trailer plus a VHS Preview Trailer.

Final Thoughts:
Catch The Heat finds Kino Lorber hitting bedrock in their search for movies to release on Blu-ray. With sun-setting efforts from screenwriter Stirling Silliphant and Rod Steiger, this ineffective blend of action and comedy is a little too light on the laughs, not-very-convincing in the action department, daft, dopey and dumb. If mildly exciting cheese with characters named Checkers Goldberg and Cinderella Pu is your cup of tea, give it a rent. But most movie fans should probably just Skip It.

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